April 3 2023

It’s been a week of some hella fucking intense emotions and some hella fucking cool close encounters with herons.

I was down by the water the other evening after work and walked to the edge of a little dock where no one could see my face. I was framed by harbourside industry and a marshy shoreline with dense scruffy budding bushes. As my body relaxed, tears started streaming down my face, and then out of the corner of my eye I saw a great blue heron standing about 15 feet away from me looking stoic and serene. I thought that if I watched him too eagerly he might fly away or get startled, but he stayed in place for a very long time as I cried out my eyes. I vowed to stay there until he flew away, and after about 20 minutes he pulled himself out of the shallow water and gracefully glided his giant body over to the other side of the harbour to meet his mate. They both flew off towards a cluster of buildings in the city centre.

On other nights I’ve had them fly super close over my head and land near by me, but never so close that I could see their neck feathers ruffling in the breeze, as I did with this encounter.

I looked up what herons represented to the First People of these lands and they’re a sign of good luck and Spring is their season.

Herons are also creatures that find stability even with their spindly little legs, and they’re self-reliant and self-possessed. They’re also incredibly patient.

Tonight I headed down to the water again as the sun was setting to eat some some noodles and as I was walking the heron flew past me and then disappeared out of view. There was a couple at the dock already so I lurked in the distance until they left. When I approached the area I saw the heron there again at a different spot from the previous evening, though still very close to where I was standing. I went down to the deck and stood alongside him and watched the sky change. After a few minutes I looked over and he was gone. He slipped off so soundlessly.

The sky was glowing pink and there were so many different textures of clouds, some large and sweeping, some densely clustered like cauliflower and other patches that were translucent and forming large sheaths over the darkening sky. I saw hints of a moon and vowed to return after I made some more noodles.

When I came back out the moon was shining brightly and I hung out under the stars. I remembered that I carry old magic within me and I shouldn’t let myself get so upset about life that I want to take leave. There’s always a sacred place inside of myself that I can come back to and I shouldn’t ever forget that. The nearly full moon held me tight and reflected the history of the world in the rippling sea water.

As I walked home I saw a shooting star in the sky, blazing behind the office towers.